I spent the early days of this week in the long journey to San Antonio where I'll be until Thanksgiving weekend. It was as difficult as I remembered and far less fun without my husband beside me to mock and do most of the driving. The pugs kept me company but the result of that was needing the car detailed today and the poor worker saying to me, "I got most of the dog hair out but there's only so much I can do."
I just said, "Trust me, I understand."
Tomorrow is a big day of house hunting and finding our home for this city. I'm excited and somewhat daunted by the prospect but I'm looking forward to the process because, for the first time, we'll be doing this together.
That together thing? It's pretty great. I missed my big lug.
At the end of this week it will be a full year since I was in Colorado for a workshop with Jen Lee. We had a quiet moment there where we talked about her idea for reaching more people than were able to attend our small gathering with her message of sharing stories, of healing and self discovery. Today, she's released that project. I would suggest kindly that if anyone is interested in discovering, documenting and directing their own stories you head over to her site and check it out.
My favorite quote, summarizing the project perfectly is this: "It's about stopping people in their tracks. It's about bring something to the conversation that only you posses. It's about excavating your bravest, boldest self and letting yourself be seen like you've never been seen before. It's about time for you to stand up and be heard.
I think that the world is thriving on making my plans liquid. I was set to leave early tomorrow morning for SAT and now I'm going to the dentist instead.
I'd write more but the tooth ache is so terribly intense that it makes opening my eyes painful and my lips feel like pressure dressings over the tooth. So, instead, I'll leave you with these few short words and the knowledge that I'm not off the band wagon yet!
Living 1300 miles away from an INTJ leads an ENFP to want to slap someone.
It's probably not only the personality profiles making this separation difficult. I'm going to be happy on Thursday night when I'm back in Mike's arms and we can fight while hugging--which is the best way to fight.
I don't know how anyone else bases their memories but lots of mine are based around flavor or smell. This morning I woke up thinking about pancakes and it took me to quiet fall mornings in Missoula, sitting in Paul's Pancake Parlor and enjoying the mural of the local college team--The Griz--and laughing with my family. I remembered the tangy sourdoughs of my childhood often made on Saturday mornings before we started our work. And then I stumbled on a sweet memory of sitting with my friend Alycia on her back patio one morning sharing waffles and some amazing maple syrup, beautifully prepared fruit and conversation.
The problem with having fewer people to talk to during the day is that now my thoughts end up in a back log. I process my thought verbally, you see. It's too distracting to try and hold on to the delicate thread of a thought unless it's formed into sound The pugs do the best they can but it's often difficult for them to express themselves in return. So instead I find myself talking very, very quickly on the phone to try and get EVERY SINGLE THOUGHT processed in a much shorter period of time.
I had the flu this weekend, or I'm pretty sure that I did. I didn't bother to go to the doctor to have that confirmed, I just lazed around bemoaning my fate. I think today is the first time in a few that I've felt very nearly peppy. I think a portion of that is the opportunity to talk to some people today and do a few random acts of kindness. That alone will make you feel better but it's also that today represents the 50% mark of my separation from Mike. It's all downhill from here. In two weeks I'll be on the road to see him and in just over two weeks I'll be back in those beefy, loving arms.
Yes, I did just say that.
Until them I'm going to try and focus a bit. Right now there a ladder sits in the middle of the kitchen waiting for me to replace the other two bulbs in the fan, several boxes are open and half filled, the laundry is somewhat done but not folded and I'm blogging.
My plan is to make another list--I love making lists!--of which things I need to finish before we leave on the off chance someone would like to see our house. I'm pretty sure I can do that.
And by 'that' of course, I mean making the list. Let's not push this accomplishment too far.
Today begins that time of year when blogs are written on for at least three days straight--NaBloPoMo or "National Blog Posting Month". Since I've been terrible about using prompts and writing all of your feeds will not be subjected to one month straight of my musings.
I do not take responsibility for the psychological damage.
Prompt for today: Favorite thing about writing.
To be honest, I didn't realize there even were prompts until I had to google the exact spelling of the event but I was considering last night that without Mike at home I probably only speak three or four times a day--and then typically on the phone or things like, "Ziggy! Please! Stop picking on the dogs! You're a cat and you're behaving like a seven year old!"
Without the focus of conversation my thoughts remain in their fractured state and without writing that could quickly lead to insanity.
Also, it was one year ago this month that I went to Colorado for a weekend retreat that spurred me to write more in one weekend that I had in the last several months. I'm hoping that NaBloPoMo will do something similar.
And so it begins. An incoherent post, lots of promise and only 30 more days to go!