Saturday, December 11, 2010

11 for to be forgone in '11

It's even the 11 o'clock hour while I'm writing this! They're everywhere!

Summary of prompt: What are 11 things you could live without in '11? How would that change your life?

1) The 'What if?!' game--I know my perpetual planner needs some projects to keep her happy but I'm really tired of wondering how life would have been different if I'd gone to BYU-Hawaii in 1995. I mean, really. It's probably time to just leave that alone.

2) Refusing to see my skills as worthwhile--At Integrate I started the weekend thinking that I was too loud and brash. Then I realized that really can be useful for me and those around me. I just need to make sure other people get face time too.

3) Pedicures--This may sound crazy but 2011 is The Year of The Strict Budget around here and I have to say that $60 to maintain my toes is probably going to go.

4) Overcommitment--I'm a recruiter, a professional photographer in need of some portfolio building, a leader of the childrens organization at church, rescuer of dogs, a lady who wants to work out and an artist. I have got to learn to focus in on the areas that are really going to benefit us the most.

5) Avoiding exercise--There is always some excuse but I'm tired of my body the way it is. For the first time in ages it's annoying me. I don't really care so much about the more skinny but I do care about feeling healthy and as though I can do the hikes and climbs I love to get the photos I want.

6) Guilt about the decor in my house--I feel badly very often that all the couches and chairs aren't decorator perfect and that most of the walls are bare and then I start to feel bad that it doesn't bother me unless I think others may be judging. That same spiral? It's over. I just have to own that other things are more important than home decor to me and always will be. I'll make some small, monthly goals to get some things done but I'm going to release that this year.

7) More notions about The Perfect Wife-- When we were first married I'd get up and make a hot breakfast, make an involved lunch and then make sure I'd made a fantastic dinner. But I'd feel bad if I was even slightly grumpy or not 'made up' during those times. Like somehow I wanted to be the girl that gets up, puts on makeup and crawls back into bed so that her husband thinks she always looks like that. While I understand the value of actions like that, it's not me. My being 'perfect' for my husband is lots more about remembering names, reminders to get up and move around and helping him purge collections. And I need to settle into that this year.

8) Excess belongings -- I've been reading a bit on minimalism and we need more of that in our life. We have TONS of STUFF. Literally. We're weeding through it a bit at a time but if we were forced to go to an urban lifestyle right now we'd need a couple dozen storage units. I'm ready for that to end. (Inspired by Ramona! Thanks!)

9) Contact Priorities -- Know how people get contact drunk? I'm like that with passion and priorities. When I'm around the lady who runs the dog rescue I work with I get all spun up about how I could/should be doing more to help her. I mean, she has nearly 40 dogs at home so I should be able to handle 10, right?! Wrong. It's one at a time around here (which usually looks more like, say, three but they're small) and that is ok. It's still saving dogs and it's still making a difference. Even if I didn't save every dog in the entire world that needed to be saved last week.

10) Ignoring my ADD -- I hate talking about my ADD. Hate. It. It feels like an excuse to me. It feels like I really should just be able to concentrate harder/better/more. Yeah, never going to happen. I've resisted medication for YEARS and had a terrible relationship with this diagnosis but it's unavoidable. This year I'm going to change that relationship. This week we watched a documentary called 'ADD & Loving it?' produced by PBS. I actually called Michael down to make him watch it with me (Michelle and Marcine, you MUST find it but I'll tell you that at Christmas.) It was very helpful. I am ADD and it's ok and it's made me who I am and I CAN do something about the portions I don't enjoy.

11) Ignoring portions of me I don't think fit -- I ignore my artist because I'm not Van Gogh. I ignore my wanderer because I'm not able to pack a single bag and travel Europe. I mean, if you can't be doing the extreme, why do anything at all? Done. With. That. I will paint, I will photograph, I will show people what I make a be proud even if they're not weeping at the beauty of my creation. I will wander and sometimes be lost and I will revel in it.

Holy Hard Prompt, Batman!

2 comments:

  1. I found this prompt very challenging too. But, it was good to start thinking forward.

    ReplyDelete